Just get out there and do science

When I tell people what I do (geologist), most will say, “I’ve never met a geologist before. That’s so interesting.” While I don’t do what people probably imagine a geologist might do, the foundation is important. I still consider myself a scientist.

This report is about a study that says parents apparently want to encourage their kids in science but don’t feel they are equipped to do so. From Science Daily: Parents Need Help Encouraging their Kids in Science http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2010/05/100510092004.htm

I have never been asked to speak at my kids school. I never get asked to speak at community events. People don’t typically inquire at my workplace about meeting scientists or having them speak to groups. I’ve been asked to speak about specific issues, but not about a job in science. Therefore, I believe most people think they have never met a scientist but we are really all around them. It’s not some esoteric subject. It’s a shame that our culture has stereotyped scientists as the brainy, socially inept white male in a lab coat with unkempt hair. That’s really inaccurate.

Here is where TV can help.

I know. TV is bad. It mostly is. But shows like Mythbusters have made science into family fun time. There is no excuse for parents not to be introducing their kids from ages 4 and up to Mythbusters as a gateway into thinking about how the world works. That is science. So, for parents that feel sleepy at the thought of watching David Attenborough documentaries, cue up Mythbusters on the tube to watch and talk about together. Then, get outside and look for bugs, fly a kite, put Mentos in soda, count the birds, look at the stars, examine dirt with a magnifying glass, hike a nature trail, watch the clouds, collect things at the beach, plant seeds, start a rock collection, identify wildflowers… I could go on and on. Just get out there and observe the world. It’s not that hard.

Kids at the Funeral

Last month, my Grandma died. She was 94. We were very close. Even in her 80s, she would travel with my Dad to our house for visits and events. When she was in a nursing home, we visited her when we were in town and my young daughter, aged 6, would cavort around the nursing home saying ‘Hi’ to everyone and decorating Great-Grandmas room with pictures and decorations.

When she died, it was not a question between my husband and I that the kids would attend the funeral. It was their first funeral – the first time someone they were close to (their Great-Grandmother) had died. My older daughter, aged 11, expressed some nervousness. The little one had a nervous tummy on the trip there – always a sign she is apprehensive.

I prepared them for what they would see at the funeral home – telling them where the casket would be, that it would be open and that Great-Grandma would likely not look like they were used to seeing her. They didn’t have to go up to see if they didn’t want to. I went through what we would do there, how long we would stay and how they should act. I reminded them that this is a quiet place but they should be prepared to be greeted by relatives they didn’t remember and so they should try to be polite. There would be no running or playing.

Funerals and weddings are the way our spread-out families get together these days so the evening was a family reunion of sorts. My parents were thrilled to see their precious grandkids, dressed all pretty. Big hugs all around. The kids, surprisingly, did not hesitate to go to the casket. They were not disturbed. Then they sat down with us. It must have been boring for them but they paid attention and were cordial with visitors. The elder smiled at those amazed at how grown-up she was, the younger tolerated with a smile Aunt Sarah pinching her cheeks. To pass the time, they discovered mints in my purse, made a trip to the water cooler and drew pictures in a notebook. All the time, being quiet and respectful.

I was amazed that none of my other cousins with small children brought theirs along but chose to leave them with babysitters. This felt wrong on many levels. Mostly, it seemed disrespectful to Grandma. One remarked that her son was more interested in doing something with his friends. The point about this occasion was lost. Unknown to them, we are a nonreligious family. The kids don’t go to church. But, I could not imagine them missing this event, regardless of the religious tone. There are some things you are obligated to do.

The next day, they went to the church, the cemetery and then the dinner afterward. The younger was Miss Social Butterfly (and got pinched out of sheer cuteness again by Aunt Sarah). From my parents to my second cousins, I received compliments about how wonderful they looked and behaved. It seems as if good behavior from children shocked people. I was extraordinarily proud as they tried to follow along with the church service and did not fidget once.

It’s not that hard to model good behavior for children. You have to start early, keep firm rules and reward them. Rewards of praise and hugs are typically enough. They understand that.

My children now know what it’s like to attend a funeral and a church service. They were also exposed to the religious-themed language and ritual that in which we are rarely involved. I would say this was a critical learning event in their lives that they will remember for MANY reasons. Also, I learned how valuable this was as a social ritual for our immediate and extended families. Even though we are nonreligious, I felt no qualms that I decided to include my children in this important cultural event. It also meant a lot to others who were there to see respectful children who said a dignified goodbye to someone they loved.

Intermission – Idea for new kids site

That creepy picture of JesusJayZombie is freaking me out so I needed a post to bump it down.

I should be reading some papers for school but I’m not. They are BOR-ING. Why is academic writing so boring? I can read some long-haired stuff but, man, this crap puts me to sleep.

I’m in the process of starting yet another blog. But, it’s not very bloggy just yet. I am constructing a web site for kids (middle readers) about monsters and spooky stuff.

Running to keep up with the fast-paced skeptics

The skeptical movement is blossoming. This is good and bad. It used to be sort of easy to keep up with things. Now, there are so many new blogs and interesting forums to follow, one can’t possibly participate in all of them. I can just about keep up on all the podcasts!

Skeptic meaning for the young

Many of today’s kids, at least my kid, seems to think it’s perfectly OK to have fun believing in ghosts, unicorns, witchcraft, demons, UFOs, vampires, and the like. They appear to understand that much of this is by choice and strictly for entertainment purposes only. It seems fair to think that childish things will eventually be discarded.

But, I’m concerned.

Uncoddled kids

I liked this article today from NY Times.

This is our parenting style. We don’t sign the kids up for endless activities, we don’t buy them tons of toys or spoil them with expensive things. They use their own money for the ice cream man and things they want in the story. They entertain themselves when they are bored. I let them play outside in the neighborhood.

Jamie Lynn Provides Parents an Opportunity

Jamie Lynn Spears’ pregnancy provides parents of girls between 7 and 14 with a golden opportunity to talk about birth control. Just do it. It’s easy. It’s absolutely necessary.

Abstinence isn’t going to cut it. That’s actually been proven. Let’s face it – kids that are too young still have sex. If you are a wise and caring parent, you encourage them to be smart about relationships but you also teach them about birth control so they don’t derail their lives with a child before its time.  The young girls in poor neighborhoods don’t have the resources that the Spears’ have to care for a child (though I would question celebrity parental skills). A 16 year girl living in relative poverty may not be able to graduate and establish her independence with a child in tow. It’s very sad. She may become a burden to society instead of an asset.

Just to add, I’ll highlight the complete disregard that the fundamentalist religionists have for the life of these young women. Nothing is so telling about the health and prosperity of a society than the status of its women. If it were left up to the fundamentalists (of all religions) women would be relegated solely to the role of broodmares, subservient to their husbands. Their religious texts support this view. I deeply resent that. Ask your Presidential candidates ‘what is the role of a woman in society?’. Their answers may be very telling.

Dropping the F-bomb

My daughter, (age 9) likes Green Day and Dave Grohl (Foo Fighters). She doesn’t share my affection for My Chemical Romance but I figure it might grow on her. Note that all three bands swear on occasion and have the Parental Warnings on their products.

For Xmas two years ago (when she was 7), she wanted the “Bullet in a Bible” DVD – the Green Day concert film. I thoroughly enjoyed it myself. She spent a weekend up at my folks around that time. I told her she’d better not bring the DVD. Grandma and Grandpa wouldn’t necessarily approve of the F-bomb dropped a few times. (Not to mention they would not appreciate the tunes.)

When I told a colleague (who is my age and has a taste for Alice in Chains and porn videos) that she thought Green Day was dreamy, he looked at me cross-eyed. “They swear a lot in their songs. You let her listen to that?” Friggin’ hypocrite…

Of all things, if the kids hears some slang words from Dave, Billie Joe or Gerard, I’m pretty sure they won’t be warped for life. In fact, she may not know what “fuck” literally means but she knows it’s not a word to be used in conversation. It’s a word that has a strong emotional tag that is useful for artists and writers. It isn’t derogatory towards a person; it’s become rather neutral.

[Aside: Remember when they weren’t allowed to say “bitch” or “ass” on TV? I remember when that most excellent waste of TV time “Dynasty” would throw “Bitch” around and everyone would gasp. How times have changed. I was, like, 10 and wasn’t allowed to watch it much.]

I would rather she understand that there are different styles of language to be used in different situations when appropriate. I don’t accept that MTV bleeps out the words “murder” or “shit” or any reference to drugs. That’s sort of dumb since they exhibit little restraint in showing videos with disgusting hot-pantsed women shaking their asses for pimps. I guess they think glorifying women as sex objects and showcasing the hedonistic excesses in life is fine.

I would rather she learn lessons about art and freedom of speech. If that means she hears the F-bomb used as an expletive (not a verb), I’m OK with that. So, I let her know that people DO judge you on what you wear, how you act and what you say. It’s up to you to chose how to express yourself but there may be consequences.

There are days when I wish I could cuss away at the world but it’s not my purpose to express anger to the masses and rile them up. When I do use the F-bomb on occasion, those around me know I’m really pissed off. Thus, it retains its power.

What’s the Reason for the Season

How’s your holiday season going so far? Gee, it’s only the first week in December. Since I noticed decorations on display at the craft store when I was looking for Halloween paraphernalia, it feels like December 25 should be, like, next week. But it’s the next FOUR weeks, actually.

I’m not a big fan of Christmas. First, my family does not celebrate any religious aspect of this time of year (or any time of year). So, I don’t warm up to people preaching “Jesus is the Reason for the Season”. Nice rhyme but the tilt of the earth’s axis is the reason for the seasons. Too bad that doesn’t sound as catchy. Just because you don’t like it doesn’t make it any less true.

Holiday time is frequently a trigger for bad memories: people miss lost loved ones, they remember disappointments or tragedies, or they sadly realize that they can’t share any joy with someone because they are alone. It’s highly insensitive to push a happy, joyful message to these folks and call them Scrooges or Grinches when they fail to join the festivities.

Xmas time for me is full of anxiety. With divorced parents on my side and various relatives spread out in the state, I worry about getting in the required visitations. I have to cart along two small children and a dog. They don’t. I have to work pretty hard to figure out appropriate gifts for those who have what they need. They don’t. When in doubt, they just hand out cash. They can send out cards and greetings. I don’t have time.

This year, I’m quite the “Grinch”. I don’t have any enthusiasm for putting up the tree. I don’t feel motivated to light up the house or festoon the interior. I might make cookies this year because the kids like that and they make thoughtful gifts. But, generally, I do not embrace the consumer excess and overexertion that goes with the holiday preparation.

I heard that among the common toy requests in children’s letters to Santa are the wishes for parents to come home from Iraq or Afghanistan, for everyone to get along (at home and in the world), and for snow to fall. How simple are those wishes. I wish the same. I want all those soldiers home from a senseless war. I want us to stop fighting abroad and at home about faith and what it means to be a good person. I wouldn’t mind a dusting of snow to make everything clean, quiet and a pretty background for the twinkling lights.

Paint It Black and Take It Back

Sigh…

There seems to be nothing exciting going on these days in the paranormal world. Oh, sure there is the current UFO flap that peaked with the O’Hare report and the Black Triangles. But, honestly, I’ve not been keeping up because UFOs don’t grab me (at least one hasn’t grabbed me yet).

All the air has gone out of Cryptomundo for me lately. Are things really so blah or is it just me?

It is Spring (so says the calendar) which may account for the lack of fun stories meant to break up the winter blues. Since a real Spring has yet to appear in the northeastern U.S., many of us are incubating viruses and passing them on. (ah-CHOO!) My daffodils, with their heads hung low, look miserable. Much like how I feel.

As frequently happens to me, I go through phases of interest. Sometimes I go on a writing jag, sometimes I devour books. I’m not in the mood to do either. I’ve been listening to music, been feeling I should pick up the gee-tar again, checking out new tunes in my favorite pop-punk category and adding to my LaLa want list.

Thanks to my current infatuation with My Chemical Romance: The Black Parade, I’ve painted my nails black, texturized my hair and threw out all my wool blazers and turtlenecks. My 3-year old is bopping along in the back seat to Dead! and Famous Last Words

Why do people sing about death? Dress like vampires? Like to watch horror movies? I can’t imagine it so I’d like to know. I’ve always been fascinated by gothic and vampire themes. But, take note: just because it’s really fun to get into these things does not mean that there is any validity to them. Plus, they’re probably unhealthy for your psyche too.

I end this rambling thought-spillage with a parental moment: What will my children use on me to rebel? They can’t get me with the occult/paranormal, heavy metal, punk, goth (“Dye your hair purple? Cool, let’s go!”) Been there, done that. So, perhaps I’ll rue the day my girls become born again Christians who like country music. Then, I’ll know I failed as a parent.